Where Is the Insight?!
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Before I begin this review in full, let me just state for anyone who may not have noticed... this autobiographical book is 124 pages long. Had I recognized this prior to purchase, I could have avoided a literary journey I wish I had not taken. The length of the book alone suggests there are problems with completeness, explanation, and insight.
Sandy Wilson, an incest survivor, with the help of a published author tells the sordid, pathetic story of her childhood beginnings. It is a sometimes graphic, sometimes evasive account of just how ugly, dirty, cruel, and dangerous life can be for a child. The product of an incestuous relationship between a biological brother and sister, Sandy Wilson is raised primarily by her grandparents. Although her grandmother and grandfather clearly commit insurance fraud by torching the shacks and trailers they have outgrown, her life remains fairly stable... until her father is released from prison.
Even while her father is clearly viewed as a predator by the author's grandfather, her grandmother appears to feel obligated to her only son and he moves in and quickly takes over the household. Sandy Wilson is forcibly raped for the first time when she is six years old.
There are many, many unanswered questions for the reader.
1. If her father was a convicted sex offender, why did her grandmother allow him almost unrestricted access to a young child? No precautions were taken.
2. In chapter 9, when the author is 9 years of age, she finally tells her grandmother what her father is doing to her. She later hears her grandmother and her biological father arguing about the repeated molestations. (Great! Now we are getting somewhere, right? Wrong!) Throughout the remainder of the book, there is NEVER any mention of this again! What happened? We know the father continues to rape the child, buy why? How?
3. Throughout her childhood, Sandy Wilson is also taught the finer points of breaking and entering, theft, and fencing. As an adolescent girl, she becomes aware that her father probably raped and murdered two teenaged hitchhikers. In the epilogue of the book (a mere 1/2 page), the author states her father managed to evade the police and any further legal consequences until his death in 1989. As an adult, why did Sandy Wilson not report her father to the authorities? (I do not really care whether she did or did not as I am not passing moral judgment, but I would have appreciated some explanation about the choices she made.)
4. Sandy Wilson moved out of her father's home several times once she reached the age of 16. Each time her father managed to find her. Why did she go back? There is no explanation given about why the author made many of the choices she did. Again, I am not passing judgment, I just want to know something of the author's thought processes.
5. After firing a shotgun at her father and blasting a hole in the wall above his head, the author indicates the sexual abuse stopped. What happened thereafter? There is not one single word about the author's life as an adult survivor of incest. NOTHING! Was her life forever scarred by the abuse to which she was subjected or did she overcome great tragedy to live an empowered existence? Your guess is as good as mine because the author never tells us.
While it was apparent that the author wanted to impart some sense that her grandparents were, even if poor and misguided, decent people who cared for her... why was her grandmother so willing to throw her under the bus? A child is raped almost daily for 3 years in the same house but the grandmother feigns lack of knowledge? Lord help us all! If the author's grandparents were concerned individuals somewhat capable of caring for a child and providing minimum stability, how and why did the author's father become such a psychopath? I could never decide if I should regard the grandmother with comtempt, pity, outrage, or all of the above. Unfortunately, the author tells us nothing about how SHE views her grandmother, so I have no way of knowing what to think or feel.
In the afterword of the book, it is stated that "Sandy Wilson shares her childhood experiences so that others may have a better understanding of sexual abuse and child exploitation." This is a lofty goal for a book full of sexual abuse "war stories" with no explanation or exploration to help define them. If the reader is interested in well written books about the issue, I strongly suggest you look elsewhere. If I could have given this book a rating of No Stars, I would have.
amazing courageous woman
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I picked up this book, and could not put it down. I was riveted by the courage of this girl, who endured so much for so long. It is amazing to me that these things can happen, and in many instances right under our noses. This girl was at the mercy of her father, and the only person who could have helped her, was too being abused. I admire this woman, because she has come so far from where she began, she learned to let go of the resentment and hate that her father deserves. In letting go, she set herself free. I commend her for this, because now she has taken control of her life, and chosen not to let anything bring her down. I can only hope i would have half her courage.