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Mixed feelings

Customer Rating:
I have mixed feelings about this book. Like many others this book made me feel that I was not alone in having a baby that needed to be held all the time. When describing the "high-needs baby" the book described my baby perfectly. I appreciate that Dr. Sears differentiates between "colick" babies and "high-needs" babies. Dr. Sears does a good job listing medical problems that could be causing a colicky baby but does not do the same for the high-needs baby. At 15 months, I found out that my baby has severe obstructive sleep apnea. Now, looking back on the book I wonder if the characteristics of the high-needs baby are not really symptoms of sleep deprivation. If your baby does not respond to sleep training and is fussy -- consider a sleep disorder and see a sleep specialist. Sleep doctors are usually found in the Pulmonary dept. of a Children's hospital. Some areas of the country may not have pediatric sleep specialist -- if so consider talking with the sleep specialist for adults. Other medical problems that cause a baby not to sleep also include allergies, relux, and restless leg syndrome. Many pediatricians are not aware of the availability of sleep specialist. Now that my baby is sleeping she is no longer a high-needs baby. Those 16 months were the hardest of my life and I sure hope anyone out there going through the same thing gets the help and answers they need.

I had one High Needs baby and one Colic Baby

Customer Rating:
"High Needs" and "Colic" are very different.

If you are going to buy this book, understand that colic babies get over their colic and then they are usually "normal" babies.

High Needs babies usually don't have colic, they are just needy ALL the time. Mine hated the swing, the stroller, the car seat, the crib, everything that wasn't me holding him ~ facing out so he can see the world. I wondered if he was in pain, I wondered why no one else's baby seemed as needy as mine, I wondered what I was doing wrong. The doctors would just shrug at me, my friends didn't understand life with this kind of baby, and I was exhausted trying to keep my baby happy.

In my heart I knew that he was like a 2 year old trapped in a baby's body. Now he's a very perceptive 9 year old and that needy behavior has turned into a deep, loving, sensitive, and happy little boy who still prefers time with mom over anything in the world ~ in confident and secure way, not needy anymore. I'm so glad I didn't try and turn him into what I thought a "normal" baby should be ~ he wasn't wired that way. He needed me, I was there, and now we are still so very very bonded.

My 2nd child was a "normal" baby, and I didn't need Dr. Sear's book ~ she ate, slept, and smiled just as I expected a baby to do. She also had colic ~ once 4pm started she was a crying mess for hours every night. That was different, it was colic. She was a good baby the rest of the time and by 4 months the colic was over. She's 5 now and still sleeps, eats, and everything else like a typical little girl, thank God, because I didn't have much left of me after the first year of my High Needs baby.

This was a GREAT book that I highly recommend!! Be sure and read his intro that describes how he learned about "High Needs".

Amy Siefker
amyskis@yahoo.com

Phenomenal!

Customer Rating:
I would tell anyone with a fussy baby to read this book. From cover to cover Dr. Sears nailed the definition of a "high-needs" baby. I felt as if he wrote the book about me and my baby. It was so encouraging to know that there wasn't anything "wrong" with my baby or with the feelings I had about her being so fussy-which is a big deal to parents of a high-needs child; most people just don't "get it". I still (my baby is now 9 months) pull this book out when we are going through a rough patch; it's very reasurring to me and reminds me that I am doing the right things for my baby.

The Opposite of Reassuring

Customer Rating:
My daughter was "colicky" for exactly 4 months and 9 days. Yes, you may not believe it when people say stuff like that, but it literally disappeared overnight. During these 4 months I was tired, stressed out, and confused as to why she was so unhappy all of the time.

Unfortunately, "The Fussy Baby Book" was the first book I read to try and find some answers and help. I couldn't even finish the book because by three-quarters of the way through I felt so guilty that my instincts seemed to differ so much from what the Sears' were describing. I needed a book that would tell me that this was just a phase that would eventually pass and I would get through it a stronger person, but instead I was told that my "high needs" baby was always going to be this way and I better learn to deal with it. Talk about a feeling of hopelessness!

There is a lot of good information in the book as well, which is why I gave it 3 stars, but most of that information I found during internet searches before I ever bought the book anyway. The overall feelings of guilt and hopelessness that I got from this book stuck with me a lot longer than any of it's good information did.

If you read this book and do not find it to be the answer, please be sure to check out these books:
1) "Your Fussy Baby" by Marc Weissbluth (Scattered writing, repeats himself a lot, and not so good as a reference, but he's really onto something with his sleep research and it will probably make you feel better about your overall situation because you will probably be able to relate to a lot of what he says - and a big point he makes is IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT AND THIS WILL END, which is definitely what I needed to hear after reading "The Fussy Baby Book"!)

2) "The Happiest Baby on the Block" by Harvey Karp (I rented the DVD, which is probably the better way to go since you can actually watch him using his techniques. They really are amazing and although they don't always work with a colicky newborn unless you practice A LOT, the basics are good and we still use some of them to this day - and my daughter is 14 months old now!)

3) "Good Night, Sleep Tight" by Kim West (We didn't use this book until my daughter was 6 months old, but it was such a miracle that I wonder what would have happened if we tried out the "Sleep Lady" methods when she was going through her colicky phase! Definitely useful to have around as it is a quick read and it covers sleep issues from birth to age 5 and for the most part is adaptable to most parenting styles.)

Good luck!

A little disappointed

Customer Rating:
After reading this book I was a little disappointed. Yes it talks about how to work with a "high need child" The Book should probably been titled more like that. I have a fussy baby, but after reading the book, I realize he is not a "high need baby". The problem is due to earlier medical issues and now problems with finding a good formula and introducing foods. The chapter that they said would cover this topic was mostly centered around breastfeeding issues, and very little on formula fed babies and feeding solids. I know that once my son "feels" better than he is not fussy. I have taken him to the doctor and they have said he is just "colicky" and thats that. I am looking for other things to try and more solutions...turning to this book I had hoped to find it and was disappointed. It is not for a "fussy" baby its for a "high need Baby".