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Connected Child provides solid direction for helping troubled adopted children

Customer Rating:
We're the parents of a couple of adopted kids, and have continually searched for specific information about adopted children with broad-spectrum diagnoses (ADHD, ODD, RAD, Bipolar Disorder). At one time or another, our kids have had all of these diagnoses attached to their issues/behaviors.

It's become clear to us -- and other parent of adopted kids with whom we speak -- that these broad-spectrum diagnoses are "convenient" terms in which to bucket our kids. These kids frequently show the same issues and inappropriate behaviors. Unfortunately, the standard process for addressing these issues (positive reinforcement, drug therapies, structured responses, diet modifications) never seem to work. This appears especially true of those kids, such as our daughter, who are adopted from Eastern European insitutions/orphanages.

We're read all of the general literature regarding these broad-spectrum diagnoses and tried every guideline in these books on how remediate these issues and bad behaviors -- all with little or no success.

"The Connected Child" speaks directly to the behavioral issues and unique emotional requirements that these adopted children require. Their approach -- based on the TCU Institute of Child Development methodology --is more a process for modifying parent behavior than addressing the child's issues and behaviors. Specifically, the book suggests that all of these kids exhibit behaviors based on perceived threats and fears established/learned during their earliest years in institutions. It recommends that parents develop -- and consistently reinforce -- a loving, affectionate, trusting and safe environment for these kids so that they can grow away from viewing people and life situations in a fearful or threatening way.

While "The Connected Child" makes a strong case for the unique issues associated with these institutionalized children and lays a relatively solid foundation for how to cope with and reach these children, in my opinion, their relatively "easy read" book with short "punchy" chapters and sections doesn't lay out the kind of structured or disciplined approach required. The authors are suggesting a life-changing and home environment-changing methodology for both the affected children, their parents and siblings, and other significant influencers in the kid's lives (teachers, counselors). More detailed direction on how to successfully implement their methodology would have been appreciated.

Additionally, I find their frequent use of "semi-miracle" anecdotes a bit too much: child couldn't be reached using standard therapies; parents -- at wit's end -- try the "Connected Child" methodology; child cured. I'm sure that there's much more trial-and-error or initial failures (by both the kids and the parents) with their methodology than are depicted in this book.

Still, I would recommend that this book be read by those parents with those adopted children who have been institutionalized and who have not responded to the traditional therapies for these broad-spectrum diagnoses. The "Connected Child" approach for building a safe and secure environment for these unique kids -- however difficult for the parents to accomplish -- deserves attention.

Great book for adoptive parents

Customer Rating:
I think this is a good resource for families who are adopting, especially those adopting children who are older and/or have had rocky starts in life.

Excellent

Customer Rating:
Excellent book - very helpful for a new adoptive mom of a 4 year old from China.

This book was our break through

Customer Rating:
What a great tool this book has been. It helped us make a break through with our second daughter who we had been struggling with for over a year. We had been working hard with all of her indivual issues in isolation. We worked with her language delays, her behavorial problems, her sleep issues, sibling struggles and more. This his book helped with the big picture and helped make all that all that other work come together in a way that really helped our whole family.

A Must Read

Customer Rating:
This book is a must-read for anyone considering adopting a child. Adopted children have very specialized needs. This easy to read book has so many practical ideas for parents. I actually think every preschool and elementary teacher should read it as well. As an educator, I am wishing I had had some of these strategies to use in the past with students who were foster or adoptive children. A great resource indeed!